BIG TEX ICON DOWN & OUT & MAKING BIG TEXAS BUCKS

Well, if you just want the news, you’ve probably already read it, but the AP story is below, with the facts, or whatever passes for a fact today. If you saw my post on Friday, BIG TEX LIT UP LIKE A MATCH HEAD, you’ve seen the better part of it, as documented by my crude copy and paste skills, which may pass for cinema verite in these troubled times. Here’s a few images I posted over the weekend, too, as they picked up the pieces.

The top dicks in the land are on the case.

Listen, I don’t hate the big lug nut, I just report the news as I see it, OK?

When no body bag of sufficient size could be located, resourceful supervisors recycled the giant Hefty bag containing rotting corpse of Rick Perry’s 2012 presidential ambitions.


Apparently the remains of the giant white dude with the mechanical drawl are temporarily stored in a warehouse and Big Tex related ephemera is selling briskly. Too bad I didn’t get these images printed sooner! But there might have been a little squabble about rights, so, whatever.

Jack Ruby did it.

That’s a repeat above from Friday, but one of the better ones, I reckon. However the first one is still my favorite, below. I just picked up the MARS ATTACKS 50th Anniversary edition book yesterday, which is supercool.

Mars Attacks 2012.

Speaking of books, don’t miss NOIR AT THE BAR, HALLOWEEN EDITION, AUSTIN, OCT. 25. See me, my terrible self, doing some murder ballads to set the tone, plus with Lee Thomas, Shane McKenzie, and your horrific host, Scott Montgomery, of BookPeople’s MysteryPeople. Ed Kurtz will be there, and surely he will read or cast a spell on you, or something. Ask him about the zombie in his trunk.

The original bubble gum cards, only 5 cents for artistic masterpiece!

A POTENTIAL SOLUTION FOR THE PROBLEM OF INTERRING MAJOR ASSHOLES????
Anyway, I was wondering, like, if they plan to bury the burned up icon, they’ll need a really big hole. There’s a lot of excavation expertise in Dallas, and this experience might come in handy. Because, sooner or later, other icons like Tom Delay, Louie Gohmert, and Rick Perry are going to die. These guys are such big assholes, the technical know-how of burying a giant like Big Tex could really come in handy. And, not to continue too far in this political vein, but elsewhere in the nation, we have Chris Christie, Joe Walsh and Todd Akin, for example, some of the biggest assholes in US political history, and so this experience could end up being very beneficial to society, having lost Big Tex and having to dispose of the grisly debris left behind.

Charred Big Tex shows different face up close. Mission Accomplished for some, sad day for others.[/caption]

Weird parallels in Dallas as titanic icon is toppled. Bush not available for comment, Cheney in undisclosed bunker.

DALLAS (AP) — As the Texas State Fair came to a close Sunday, one big mascot’s absence continues to loom large over the fairgrounds.

Big Tex, the towering, cowboy-hat-wearing icon of the State Fair for 60 years, went up in flames Friday. The only remnants were hands, parts of his shirt and the charred metal skeleton of the statue.

A makeshift memorial sprung up in his place, featuring candles, flowers, corny dogs from the fair and a banner that proclaimed Big Tex to be “lost, but not forgotten.” Billboards across Dallas also wished Big Tex well.

One fairgoer, Jill Beam, told Dallas television station KDFW that the Big Tex was the first thing she thought about when she walked down the fair boulevard.

“It’s like losing a family member,” Beam said.

The missing 52-foot-tall statue was also a reliable landmark for friends and family meeting each other at the sprawling fair.

“If a child got lost, way before cellphones, when we could come out here this is where you met,” said another fairgoer, Gayle Vaughn. “If you were in front or near Big Tex, you would be safe.”

Vendor Debra Williams told The Dallas Morning News that Big Tex bobbleheads and lapel pins were going fast.

“Anything with Big Tex is selling,” Williams said.

Glenda Parks of Austin got the last shirt Saturday from Williams’ stand commemorating Big Tex’s 60th birthday this year.

“Since he died yesterday, this is the shirt you have to have,” Parks said.

Fair organizers have vowed to rebuild Big Tex for next year.

The statue’s remains are in a warehouse on the fairgrounds, the Morning News reported. Though the fire was originally suspected to have started in Big Tex’s right boot, officials now think it was sparked by an electrical outlet near his feet.

Quanah Parker gets the last word.


State Fair officials began to worry about Big Tex’s mental stability last year when he bit a state fair technician on the ass.

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